Sunday, March 12, 2006

What's a Girl Gotta do to Get Converted Around Here?

I was hanging out last night and I'm pretty sure I saw a demon. He looked exactly like what the liar wolf said the bad ones look like. So I followed him. But I couldn't keep up. He just disappeared on me. By then, I was in a pretty bad neighborhood and didn't really know where I was. I found a bus stop and decided to wait there. (yeah, like a bus ever comes in this city) and some doped up freak comes along and starts hassling me. Right before I was going to kick him in the nards, a fang shows up. At first I was scared because he came from absolutely nowhere, I swear. But then I remembered, hey, I'm on a mission and this is not a bad thing. The fang scares off the doper and I figure, this is it. He was a total babe with green eyes like you wouldn't believe. I was so ready! I'll do anything, I said. Anything at all, if you'll convert me, because my life is just so totally in the tank, I don't think I can stand to be human even five more minutes. I get hit on all the time. All the time! I know I look good. Guys like the package. So get this, the hunky fang gets me a cab, gives me his card, and sends me home.

I gave $500 to Jonny to convert me, plus did all the other sicko stuff with him, so there's no way I can pay the other guy now. The paper is full of stories about people getting converted without asking, and demons swooping down and taking people away, and if you read The Post, there's nothing but stories about how demons are sex fiends. How come Ican't get converted when I'm trying to?

Oh, and when I got home, I found the vamp's card and it said Tiberiu Korzha. The hottest fang in the whole freaking city, the one who plays with humans all the time, and he freaking won't convert me? I must have a sign on my forehead (and my back) that says pathetic loser on it.

3 Comments:

At 3/13/2006 02:24:00 AM, Blogger Crimson Fan said...

Sweetheart you have already been converted. It doesn't take until your first full moon. Why do you refuse to believe thay?

Most likely a demon isn't going to swoop you away because they sense you're a wolf(or soon to be one).

Jonny give her the $500 back so she'll have some extra $$.

Tiber, hot? Absolutely! However, he is very taken and not chasing humans now but then he hasn't in a long time. You should thank him for saving you.

You're not a pathetic looser & if you want to win hearts you're going to have to develop self confidence.

Good luck... I worry about you.

 
At 3/13/2006 05:16:00 PM, Blogger Elle said...

You sound just like my mom.

 
At 3/14/2006 06:22:00 PM, Blogger Crimson Fan said...

I don't know how thats a bad thing...call it a voice of reason.

And STOP calling yourself a pathetic looser.

 

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